A Mother of A Job

April 12, 2018

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It is almost May and that means it is time to start thinking about Mother’s Day.   Being a mom is tough, backbreaking and stretch-mark ensuing work.  And that is just giving birth.  Then you have years of cleaning up puke, poop, pee, laundry, dishes and on and on and on.

Yet is the best job in the world and we are junkies.  We keep coming back for more!

Here are a few things I have learned about Motherhood.  Guaranteed to give you a cringe and maybe even a laugh.

  1.  Elephants are pregnant for 22 months and then give birth to a 200 pound calf (so it could be worse ladies).
  2.  Orangutan moms never put their babies down and nurse them for 6-7 years (and you thought your boobs were saggy).
  3.  A mother Koala feeds her babies her own feces (that would certainly make dinnertime easier).
  4.   A polar bear puts on 400 during pregnancy (I can relate).
  5.  The oldest mother in recent history gave birth to a baby girl at age 70 in 2008 in India (no thanks).
  6.  A woman in Russia holds the record for most kids…..69 children between 1725-1765 (get off me already).

One thing for sure, with a lot of women still working outside of the home while raising their kids (hello super high cost of living in Colorado) being a mom has gotten even more demanding.

On average I get about 10 emails a DAY that have IMPORTANT information about my kids.  3 schools, 2 different activities/sports, church, youth group, music lessons and other things demanding my schedule, attention, time and money.  These are things that if I don’t read them then I hear “mom….I was supposed to wear my pajamas today for pajama day and all of my friends had their pajamas on….didn’t you see the email from the teacher?” Also, nightly homework routine, signing permission slips and homework notebooks, reading logs make my eyes swim.  Mostly because I am crying with all of the responsibilities.

Then let’s add on getting them places.  To school.  Home from school.  To/from practices, youth group, church, etc.  Last week I spent 3.5 hours in my car (with minimal waiting) in ONE DAY alone.  I would say I average 2 hours a day taxing kids.

Next…..housework.  I probably average 2 hours a day (on the low end) cleaning, doing dishes, picking up, making meals, etc.  That would probably be higher except that my husband (bless his soul) does our laundry.

Don’t just take my word for it.  A recent article stated that moms work an average of 98 hours per week between their job and their house and kids.  That is 14 hours a day.  No wonder the expression “tired as a mother”.

So if you have a mother or are married to a mother….you need to do something awesome for her this year!  Maybe it is a weekend away with her girlfriends while you take care of the kids and house for the weekend.  Maybe it is a nice dinner out and some adult conversation.  Maybe it is a mani-pedi so she can pamper herself.  If you really want to knock it out of the park I have the perfect gift for you……..photographs.  Moms love photos but are rarely in them as they are usually the ones taking the pictures.

As moms we are also SUPER critical.  It is hard to gain and lose 30+ pounds multiple times in multiple years.  I had 3 babies in 5 years and they are spaced at least 2 years apart!  We also don’t always take the best care of ourselves as we are often taking care of everyone else.  We don’t always have the time (or let’s be honest energy) to go to the gym and eat super healthy.

However, I once heard a comedian that hit the nail on the head for me.  He said something to this nature: “Kids don’t really care if their moms have a few extra pounds.  In fact, no teenage boy wants the “hot mom”.  Kids just want their moms to be comfy when they sit in their lap and for them to smell like cinnamon.”  Isn’t that the truth?  Your kids just want you to be there for them.  To be a “comfortable” place to sit and for you to make them cookies.  That certainly takes the pressure off!  We moms need to quit looking at all of the ladies with their perfect (I’ve never given birth) bodies and just focus on ourselves and not bash our imperfections.  Because the less time you spend at the gym….the more time you can be at home (not that I am saying you should be a fat slob……I’m just saying to do the best you can and not obsess about looking perfect).

Despite all of the trials, hardships and stretch marks….we LOVE being a mom more than anything in the world.  And we want to cherish this small window of time when our kids are little and still under our roofs.  We want to remember the funny way they say certain words and how their hair smells after a bath.  We want to look in at them sleeping at the end of a LONG tantrum filled day and just soak in their cherubic faces.  We want photos of ourselves with them.  And when we are grown up…..we want pictures of ourselves with our moms.  As our moms age and eventually pass away, we want those memories to last forever.  So think about booking a mother’s day mini session for yourself and for your kids.

Follow this link below to sign up for times either Saturday, April 28th or Sunday, April 29th.  $149.

And if you need a really great laugh….go watch The Mother’s Day 2 Episode of The Middle.  Seriously.  It is the best representation of what moms want for mother’s day and how it backfires.

Here’s to all the moms out there.  I see you and I am rooting for you.  And I will have your back and bring cookies to the bake sale if you will work my hour at the book fair.

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I'm Lisa (aka LiLo), your new favorite branding strategist and brand photographer.

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